Future Update
Blog URL http://www.futureupdate.wordpress.com
Located Silver Spring, Maryland USA
Tags future, fake news, humor, satire, technology, politics, society
Humorous news of tomorrow.
Latest Blog Posts
- Senate Bill Would Ban Nose-Picking While Driving on Nov 19, 2009 in News States distracted driving fake news future humor nose-picking Satire texting traffic fatalities
November 19, 2029—A bipartisan bill introduced Wednesday would provide incentives for states to ban drivers from picking their noses while behind the wheel. The legislation, introduced in the Senate, is the latest measure designed to curb deaths an...
- Augmented Reality Network Crashes, Leaving Millions Dataless on Nov 17, 2009 in Life News technology augmented reality Consumer Electronics fake news future gadgets Mormons NOW Satire sex offenders Starbucks
November 17, 2029—TEL-U Mobile said today that network disruptions yesterday led to inoperable augmented reality service, leaving millions of customers to walk or drive around with no information about what they were seeing. The outage began abo...
- Michael Phelps Admits to Faking Marijuana Use for Publicity on Nov 13, 2009 in Entertainment sports future humor Satire fake news Michael Phelps LeBron James Andre Agassi David Duchovny
November 13, 2029—Michael Phelps’ upcoming autobiography contains a shocking admission that he never actually used illegal drugs during his storied career in competitive swimming. According to an excerpt of the autobiography, “Wet,” publishe...
- Disgraced NASA Chief Flees Earth on Nov 12, 2009 in Crime News World Biden fake news FBI future humor Iran Israel NASA North Korea Star Wars
November 12, 2029—Former NASA Administrator Cy Phiphan appears to have fled the planet after learning that a special prosecutor has been appointed to investigate his role in the apocalypse fraud scheme. Federal investigators yesterday subjected Phi...
- Sosa Says Face Cream Made Him Look Like Asian Woman on Nov 11, 2009 in Entertainment Life sports Chicago Cubs cosmetic surgery fake news future humor Sammy Sosa Satire
November 11, 2029—Sammy Sosa says a revolutionary cosmetic cream he uses to soften the skin around his cheeks and eyes is the reason he now resembles an Asian woman. The former Chicago Cubs slugger, whose use of cosmetic creams and hair-straighteni...
- The Premature Future: Engineered Rabbit Penises on Nov 10, 2009 in News Science health erectile dysfunction future humor penis Viagra
FU’s occassional step away from the future and into our crazy present. Using tissue grown in a laboratory, researchers have engineered fully functional replacement penises. The organs were made for rabbits, but the technique may someday be us...
- CDC to Ration Death Vaccine on Nov 9, 2009 in News health Eli Lilly fake news FDA future humor mimes Satire vaccine
November 9, 2029—Federal health officials announced today that, because they have to ration the scarce supply of the new death vaccine, they will withhold the medication from groups that have been identified in public opinion polls to be the least...




